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Unhappy Help me... - 01-30-2011, 11:28 AM

I just want to vent. I have no friends to talk to, you guys are the closest things to "friends" I have... Here goes...


I suck at being a mom. I feel like my daughter hates me... she is only 2, but still. She doesn't listen to me (listens to Rob though), yells at me, tells me to shut up, hits me, throws fits, etc... All I want right now is to leave everything I have here in California for 5 days and go to Nebraska. Clear my head. That is impossible though. I am dead broke. It kinda sucks because Nebraska is the one place that I can go that will help me calm down. I have put her in her room for now, so that maybe I can just relax for about 10 minutes, but she is in there screaming at me... I don't even know what to do anymore. At first, it was really easy being a mom. The getting up at all hours of the night to feed her, change her, or just because she wanted to be held, but now its a freaking nightmare. She is in her terrible 2's. They aren't just terrible, they are horrifying. Everyone always tells me how the newborn stage is the hardest because you are always tired, I would rather be in the newborn stage getting up every hour to feed her. Because what I am dealing with right now is way worse than being tired all the time... I hate when she screams. It makes me feel like I'm abusing her, but I'm not. My mom told me to join a mother's group. They all want money for me to join... What the fuck is it with people that need your money for a group where you provide all your own shit?? It doesn't make sense to me. Like, at all.

And the fact that I keep losing people I love doesn't help the matter either. I have lost 4 friends, my father in law, and 2 grandpa's. (They all died...) I realize it's all a part of life, but it's hard on my heart. I just don't get why I have to lose all my family and friends... Why can't everything just be perfect for one year?? That is all I want. One year out of how ever many I will live.

So, I guess what I need from you guys, aside from someone who wants to talk to me, is I need to know what you guys do to contain or release stress/depression/anger. I need to know what keeps you guys from flying off the handle, because I'm afraid that if I keep getting mad the way I do, that everyone I love will disappear.

Thanks, guys, for reading this. If you didn't read it then oh well. I don't want flaming, hatred, anger, or anything related on this thread. All I want is help. Advice.

Thanks.





^Thanks, Devon! <3
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Last edited by Mizmandilynn; 01-30-2011 at 11:30 AM.
  
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Default 01-30-2011, 11:41 AM

Hm... I'm no expert on child raising and what not, but I'd assume if you establish control (IE punishing for bad behavior, and rewarding for good) your daughter will treat you more like she should. Like I said, I could be wrong, just a suggestion. Like my friend has a little brother that's a demon, because his parents don't really put their foot down for anything. I'm not saying 'break' your kid into respecting you, I'm saying taking it step by step to establish that you are the one in their life that will always be there for them and the one that they should respect.

For relieving stress, maybe ask Rob to take her somewhere for a while and use that time to relax? Light some candles, lay down, put on some chill music, etc. I usually just lay down and go on rainymood.com for a while. Since I'm a nerd, I play games to calm down, too. xP

Most importantly, you have to remember that life will always have its ups and downs. You're gonna go through some bad to make it to the good, and sometimes it seems like it'll never end, but it will.



Hope all that helped,

~Wergy
  
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Default 01-30-2011, 11:50 AM

Thanks Wergy. Yea, I do punish for bad behaviour and reward for good, but the punishments don't seem to help anything. I spank her and she goes right back to what she was doing before. My mom said I just need to be persistent, but I don't know how I can be anymore persistent that what I already am. Thank you though, for the advice. I think that today I will have him take her either swimming or to the park so that I can just have me time. I haven't had time to myself in a long time...





^Thanks, Devon! <3
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Default 01-30-2011, 11:56 AM

Read your VM's, love.



Sometimes we just need a friend.
Someone to hold us when you can't stand.
Sometimes even to pretend like you matter for that split second that everything seems to be crashing down.
And sometimes it's just easier to say goodbye.

  
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Default 01-30-2011, 12:00 PM

Well, we're always here to help, some more than others. ;p As far as I can tell, every kid has a little rebellious stage around that age, and as long as you keep up what you're doing, she'll turn out just fine.

Best of luck getting some time to relax and gather your thoughts.

Edit:: Britt's ossim. x3
  
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Default 01-30-2011, 12:03 PM

Thanks guys. I really do appreciate it. <3
And I hope everyone knows I'm not doing this for attention. I really did need people to talk to.





^Thanks, Devon! <3
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Default 01-30-2011, 06:14 PM

i can tell ur trying really hard....i feel really bad, i dont know how u feel becuz i dont have a kid...u seem like a great mother and person inside and out
  
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Default 01-30-2011, 06:22 PM

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i can tell ur trying really hard....i feel really bad, i dont know how u feel becuz i dont have a kid...u seem like a great mother and person inside and out
Thanks dude. That meant a lot to me.





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Default 01-30-2011, 07:20 PM

Wow, I'm really sorry its like that. When my parents had me and my brother they said we were angels because we had someone to play/talk to. I'm no child expert (or hope to be one day), but maybe if she had someone to play with or something it'd occupy her and she would behave for more chances to be with that person.

Again, I'm really sorry and I hope everything turns out for the best.





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