SilabGarza - RS Private Server  
Home Forum Play Register Store Market Highscores Mark Forums Read
Go Back   SilabGarza - RS Private Server > Off Topic > Social Life > Advice > Other
Reload this Page My life limit is being stretched to its maximum


My life limit is being stretched to its maximum
Old
  (#1 (permalink))
Me Gusta is Offline
<span style="color: deepskyblue">PhD in Feels & Psychology</span>
image
 
Me Gusta's Avatar
 
Posts: 359
Cookies Given: 147
Cookies Received: 45
Time Online: 20 d 5 h 6 m
Clan: The Feels Specialist team
   
Default My life limit is being stretched to its maximum - 11-27-2013, 08:33 AM

Time flies...one moment it was the start of the year 2013, and another moment, it is already 1 month away from 2014. This year, is the first time that I have felt myself really unusual and erratic. Been through a considerable amount of ups and downs in life for the past one year, I could feel myself aging fast so much that whenever I tidy my appearance in front of a mirror, I imagined myself having a white beard and white hairs.

I had decided to work against my bad habits, like mumbling when talking with someone else, being retarded at the wrong time, etc. Although it was successful, but each time I managed to resolve some in real life problems, there were more to come for me to face.

After I had entered Freshmen year in college, I met a beautiful female classmate during Orientation camp, but I wasn't attracted to her at all. Then there was a time I felt a strong sense of liveliness when I was around her, but I questioned myself, and held myself back by telling myself that " I must be confused with myself, I am not in love with her ". For that few months, everything went well in my life, I had no problems maintaining my grades, and both of us were actually good friends, and would text each other once every few days. Although I knew I like her, but I know that I should talk to her with an intention of a friend.


Holiday had started, which was way back nearly 3 months ago, then she had invited me to attend a youth church service with her. Don't know why, but there were strings of minor misunderstanding between me and her, which eventually made me quit FPS game for her. We kept apologising to each other profusely whenever we clear up a misunderstanding each time. Eventually, I had decided the best way to end this once and for all was to invite her to a dinner. Although she declined it straightforwardly and honestly, and I thanked her for being honest, but from that day onward, she totally ignored me.

Ever since she did that, I wrote formal apology texts out of sincerity but without any replies from her even though she has seen them on Whatsapp. Every single day after she ignored me, I felt really wrecked and filled with bitterness, which I hid them behind a normal smile. Life was quite a struggle for me, but for whatever reasons, I still managed to live through the boring holiday without her texting me.

I did what could be best for both of us. Several days before school reopened, I texted her, telling her that I was going to delete her number off my contact, and let both of us pretend that nothing ever happened, and I totally meant what I had said to her.





First day when I returned back to school, I took a real mental bashing. I tried my best to act cool while both of us ignored each other when we pass by each other. Nobody can understand how it feels at that time, all I could describe is that, the silence between us was so bitter cold, and I could see that she had obviously lost a lot of weight. Still, I have to control my emotions at that point of time. But as the day passed by, I suppressed a lot of emotions within me without telling anyone other than my very close female best friend. Suppressing those emotions were really hard, and I hide my stress and unhappiness in front of everyone I see. Whenever I reach back home from school, I would unknowingly engage in several hours of gaming up to 4 hours just to destress myself. Then by the time I finished gaming, it was really hard for me to start writing my homework or revise them, then I would sleep.

Today is the 6th week of 3rd term of college, and I have to admit, time really flies fast. For the past few weeks, I had to pretend that I didn't saw her another humorous smoker from my class flirting with each other, and finally, I totally just ignored their presence. Today is the day that I finally told myself that, time can heal everything and I wasn't even least affected by her presence recently, and I could concentrate during lectures.

I just realised how stupid I was, for being affected by her presence for the past 8 weeks, that I had to destress through gaming and ended up affecting my studies. I just realised that I got baited, fell for that trap. Suddenly, I feel nothing special for her anymore, just suddenly realised that her unique smile, dressing, all nothing...but "all those glitters that is not gold"

But life has taught me one of the valuable lessons that I will never forget. I don't blame her for doing this to me, but if I had a chance, I would express my gratitutes to her for doing this to me, so that I can not only keep track of my priorities in life, but also to be mindful that if she had accepted me in the first place, I would not have been able to manage my studies and relationship properly ,and would end up hurting her more than myself. Besides that, I would probably struggle with life worse than what I am currently experiencing right now.

It feels great to express my gratitute, and I feel more liberated from my existing problems. The only regret is that I had foolishly wasted 8 weeks feeling sad over her, and end up affecting some of my subject grades. Whats better is that every pieces of the riddle just fell into place nicely for me.

I hope everything would be better each day for me.
  
The Following 5 users gave Me Gusta some cookies:
Behind (11-27-2013), bl1tz ya up (11-27-2013), Brady (11-27-2013), Darkdanger16 (12-05-2013), Reversee (11-27-2013)
Old
  (#2 (permalink))
Insecurities is Offline
RSN: Serial Memer
image
 
Insecurities's Avatar
 
Posts: 6,434
Cookies Given: 686
Cookies Received: 1,227
Time Online: 114 d 17 h 23 m
   
Default 11-27-2013, 09:11 AM

Yo I know how you feel man. Went through pretty much the same thing after I broke up with my most recent ex. Shit's hard when you feel an emotional attachment to a person and then that person suddenly stops accepting it.





In-game name: Pat
Promoted: 25/1/2013
Re-promoted: 5/3/2014
Spoiler

  
Old
  (#3 (permalink))
Behind is Offline
<span style="color: lavender">&lt;span style=&quot;color: black&quot;&gt;Singularity&lt;/span&gt;</span>
image
 
Behind's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,152
Cookies Given: 265
Cookies Received: 548
Time Online: 79 d 18 h 55 m
Clan: pking?
   
Default 11-27-2013, 09:54 AM

Yeah i kinda had the same situation like you and that girl

but instead of me ignoring her existence for 2 years to forget about her and try to get over her, i started talking to her again and now we're "friends" but every now and then she sends me mixed signals that lead on too to many questions in my head and it's a complete mind fuck.

But ohwell i've finished school and i don't see her everyday which helps, but everytime i see her out of school the old emotions come back, fkn sucks m8

but nah i hope you get on with life well mateeee and forget about stooooopid girls


  
Old
  (#4 (permalink))
Arcanex is Offline
<span style="color: black">Aesthetics!</span>
image
 
Arcanex's Avatar
 
Posts: 3,548
Cookies Given: 195
Cookies Received: 136
Time Online: 26 d 20 h 31 m
Clan: People with a Brain
   
Default 12-02-2013, 03:01 PM

No idea what the fuck you're doing man, but in my opinion you're fucking yourself right now.

Go and walk up to this girl who has been your soulmate, tell her you wanted to invite her over for diner just like family. Tell her that's she's like a sister to you, a soulmate whatever.

YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE WHO YOU CAN HAVE SUCH AN HONEST RELATIONSHIP WITH EVER AGAIN!

I'd kill someone for such a person to be my friend.

She must have somehow missinterpretted your invite for diner. No way in hell she would lose a friend so dear to her for no reason.

I know there is no structure or whatsoever in this but I just want to type as fast as possible so you can go make it up as fast as possible. I've recently dropped so many shitfriends that I'd switch in 30 more of those to have someone like you had.

GO MAKE IT UP RIGHT NOW!


#1 "Oldfag"
  
Old
  (#5 (permalink))
Me Gusta is Offline
<span style="color: deepskyblue">PhD in Feels & Psychology</span>
image
 
Me Gusta's Avatar
 
Posts: 359
Cookies Given: 147
Cookies Received: 45
Time Online: 20 d 5 h 6 m
Clan: The Feels Specialist team
   
Default 12-03-2013, 03:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Arcanex View Post
No idea what the fuck you're doing man, but in my opinion you're fucking yourself right now.

Go and walk up to this girl who has been your soulmate, tell her you wanted to invite her over for diner just like family. Tell her that's she's like a sister to you, a soulmate whatever.

YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE WHO YOU CAN HAVE SUCH AN HONEST RELATIONSHIP WITH EVER AGAIN!

I'd kill someone for such a person to be my friend.

She must have somehow missinterpretted your invite for diner. No way in hell she would lose a friend so dear to her for no reason.

I know there is no structure or whatsoever in this but I just want to type as fast as possible so you can go make it up as fast as possible. I've recently dropped so many shitfriends that I'd switch in 30 more of those to have someone like you had.

GO MAKE IT UP RIGHT NOW!
I know what I am doing, I'm doing it because I know what I'm doing.
She's like a soulmate, but you'll never know if she WILL DEFINITELY be my life partner.
We are just normal friends, now we're aquaintance. Telling her that she's like a good friend, sister of stuff like that is going to make it worse.
I would kill someone for such a person to be my friend.
I don't even consider our friendships very close.
I can find someone else to be with an honest relationship with, but it will take time and probably would stumble upon it in the future.

In my opinion, I would rather lose her as a friend, then to go through everything again.

I may sound like a scum right now, but I know that if she's really meant for me, we would meet the same way as it was again.
  
Old
  (#6 (permalink))
Nsync92 is Offline
#
image
 
Nsync92's Avatar
 
Posts: 93
Cookies Given: 16
Cookies Received: 8
Time Online: 1 d 12 h 23 m
Clan: Team-Minorities
   
Default 12-05-2013, 05:47 PM

we dont love these hoes
  
Old
  (#7 (permalink))
Obby Veng Us is Offline
<span style="color: lavender">Realist</span>
image
 
Obby Veng Us's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,838
Cookies Given: 0
Cookies Received: 19
Time Online: 33 d 10 h 5 m
Clan: TPD
   
Default 12-05-2013, 10:14 PM

I feel ya on this. I go through the same shit sometimes with an old ex myself. The on again off again feelings you get just talking to them. It's really enough to drive someone mad.


So instead of stressin about it, put it behind you and don't think about it.


  
Old
  (#8 (permalink))
Darkdanger16 is Offline
LILJON
image
 
Darkdanger16's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,023
Cookies Given: 139
Cookies Received: 152
Time Online: 26 d 22 h 31 m
Clan: FJ
   
Default 12-06-2013, 12:42 AM

this was beautiful, thanks for the wonderful read. Good luck in college
  
adsense code2.3
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

My life limit is being stretched to its maximum

Other




Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
adsense2.6
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:42 PM.





Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.