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Default This is it, adios SG. - 11-11-2014, 04:36 PM

I told most of you that I was going to stick around this time, but old habits die a little too hard I suppose. I just want to let it be known that this will be my last visit to SilabGarza, and I do wish you all the best of luck. It's been a hell of a ride, and I'm going to do a little recapping in terms of people and memories and such. I played this server back in 2008, and that was a really, really long time ago. Gir, and everyone else who was with me back then have all grown up so much, it's nice to see. If there was ever a time to read one of my stupidly long posts, this would be it.

I've decided that it's my time to go after speaking with Travis last night on Skype, and we discussed some things, and I'm going to make my exit before it gets more ugly. While I spent my time on certain characters and accounts, I feel the need to list all of my accounts in chronological order, so I'm going to do so now...
Haiku >> xDex >> xKrypteria >> JimmyDex >> R0fl Pker >> HonKey >> Chinky >> DarkSilent >> HaikuV2
I didn't do a whole lot while I was here this time around on HaikuV2, mainly due to the fact that I have obligations to manage elsewhere, and while I did desperately want to try to help out SG; it's out of my authority here anymore. I'm going to leave the impressive task of pulling SG out of the ground to the amazingly persistent team here, and I trust that you'll be able to do it if you work hard enough. When you grow up, you learn when to let things go, you learn that certain things just aren't meant to remain in your life; when to just see things out the door. I've realized that it's approached that point with Silab in my life, mainly due to the fact that I've been here causing chaos for way too long.
Haiku's Story
I feel like I should post something dramatic to start this off, but it's entirely not necessary. Most of everyone know's me from that account because I was one of the only co-owners that Gir has allowed on his server, and a lot of dramatic things happened while I had some sort of power on there. I just remember teaming up with Puppets, and that was my largest mistake here by far, if you team up with a menace; you become a menace. It was not a smart career move for me at SG. However, while I was Haiku I made numerous friends, some of which I still have right now. I made a lot of enemies too, people who thought they could do my job better than I did, or change the server in ways that they believed I was unable to. I'm going to make a list of people that are important to me now at the bottom of this thread, and if you're not in there, sorry but you're not that important.

Anywho, my last act as co-owner on this server was a massive drop party. I completely destroyed the economy of SG, and I never felt better about anything I'd done on this server. It's true, I felt entirely used by Gir to get players onto the server, spending hours doing simple text modifications so that we could get a new PK Box, and various other things that I thought would do some good for the server. A lot of people were upset with me, but I felt almost... a feeling of respect from many of the members, as I was the only one at the time who had the balls to stand up to Travis because the way he handled the team was not going to work for anyone at all. As time progressed, I eventually came back under several names, I just checked in here and then... and then I remember coming back and meeting someone who ended up being insanely special to me, so I sought to make SG my home again.
DarkSilent's Story
I went under the name DarkSilent, and almost everyone was over joyed that I had finally returned for a more than temporary stay. Most of my older friends had remained at the server, and they knew what I was capable of doing, with my abilities that I may be able to better SG... as it's been in a downhill swing for years now. It wasn't a long matter of time before I was posting actively, people were asking Travis to promote me, and I became another "thing" for SG. None of it really mattered to me though, I came to the server for one specific purpose, and I'm leaving this server; specifically for the same purpose. Brittany, who at the time, I heavily debated was really just a dude behind a screen, was the reason I rejoined. I remember meeting her when her name was lil fucker, and it probably took five words for me to decide that she was worth putting the past behind me and I stepped back into this server with different expectations. However, I turned malignant, and cold when it came to her. I mistreated and abused our relationship, and it wasn't who I am. Eventually, I came into some power on SilabGarza again, Travis was just starting to get into the mood of actually giving me a chance to prove myself, and that was when I decided I'd use Britt's pictures she'd entrusted me with in order to finalize the deal with Gir. Of course, this ended terribly, the secret inevitably getting out, and my resignation as I couldn't bring myself to face what I'd done.

It's been a long time since all of this occurred, almost four years now. I've been trying to fix my mistakes for so long, all of them, and it's come to my attention that I'm not going to be able to fix my long, long list of mistakes. Granted, someone who was once everything to me told me, "everyone makes mistakes, even you"; I don't deserve to be able to find retribution for the millions of mistakes I made on this server. Trust me when I say this guys, really understand my next sentences...

Travis is an emotional wreck, he's overwhelmed with his life, and while most of you believe SG is his life; it isn't. He's been one of my close friends for nearly a decade now, and whether he believes it or not, I'd have done anything to see him improve his mental and emotional state. I couldn't imagine handling the amount of stress and responsibility that SilabGarza is without help, trusting no-one, allowing no-one to get through his millions of walls. If he doesn't complete an update on time, or if he doesn't get something done that the community wants, cut him some slack. We're all just blank stories, and while some of us are filled in with words of gold; others aren't. You have to understand the world from his perspective because the world has broken him. Be reasonable and respectful of him, don't make the same mistakes I have, and you'll see a different side of him. Granted he hates me now, Travis will always be one of the few people in this world that I would drop whatever I'm doing if he asked for my help. You'll see that side of him as well, I promise you.

Now, as for my leaving... I've lived every story there was to tell here. I, at one point, was in complete control over who was promoted and demoted on the server. I was entirely able to make decisions on what things were programmed, what events and prizes were created, and dictate how the updating system went. I've spent hours searching coordinates for new ideas of home, better places to locate particular things for the server, and searching hours on end for tutorials and ideas to better SilabGarza. I've been on the best side of the staff, I've maintained the staff, I've led the staff, and shit; I've even been banned by my best friends. I've come and seen it all, so for that, I thank all of SG's team, and everyone who's led me down this exhausting pathway to my final moments. Nobody should ever have to go through life without the type of friends and companionship I've made throughout my stay here. I thank each and every once of you for giving me the chance to become something of myself, and the wisdom and courage you've given me throughout the years.

I believe in Travis, and I believe in SG. I believe that you all will be able to overcome this extreme diversity, the lack of players, the insufficient updates, and the dying of the community in general. I've never been one to support Travis unless I was the one helping him, but I support you now old friend, I really do. I'll forever be cheering for SG to one day regain it's position as a top server, and it's honestly saddening that I won't be there to partake in the festivities when it does. Alright, I'm gonna mention some people now... so I guess, yeah. This is it ladies and gentlemen.



>> Travis/Gir <<
I looked up to you. You were my idol on this server, and I did everything I could to impress and help you. I'd have broken my back to see this server succeed, and throughout the hours of typing and searching for coordinates, and helping you with all of the creation of Varrock's home and everything, I know I made a dent in this server. You're a good person, Travis. I know you're dealing with some things right now, certain things that were made secret, and just know that life goes on. I don't know the official, unbiased situation, but I do know that you've got a child who will grow up to know his dad. I know you've got an intelligent mind, and the ability to get things done when you want them to be done. Know you've always got a friend in me, now and forever, and if you ever need help you'll always know where to find me. You've given me so much, nothing I ever do will be able to give back the amount I owe. Good luck old friend, with everything. I believe you can do this, so please believe in yourself, please for the sake of everyone. Have confidence.

>> Brittany <<
You... I just can't even find the words. You're my inspiration. Beginning in the military, giving everything up for love. Being raised under a negligent mother, having a father that wasn't there for you growing up. I'm glad I got to know you, got to love you. I've tried to come back to this server, and each time I was driven away with the fear of making the same mistakes I have with you. I want you to know that your life is precious, and if there was one lesson I could pass on to you, it'd be that of self confidence. When I first met you, you were struggling, you were overly emotional and you had severe problems with your mother and your home life. You didn't know who you were, and you needed someone. No, you didn't need me. I'm glad you chose me at first though because beyond everything that ever happened to me at SilabGarza, all of the wisdom I gained from the members; how to love someone properly, whether it's from a distance or in person was the greatest thing I was ever taught. You taught me that, and for that... I will always be grateful. I'm sorry that I loved and lost with you, and it'll always be my biggest regret. Just know that you'll always have me, any shape and form. You'll get through this, I promise you will. Keep being strong for me, for you, and for everyone else.

>> Josh/Mircast <<
I love you kid. I really do, you're one of my best friends. You'll always have me, I promise. Sorry I haven't been around much for you, but you're a great guy. I remember all of the times that I didn't know what I'd do, and you were always there for me. With my situations, with my depression issues, you were there for me. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, but I always will be from now on. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. I hope you never forget about our memories and everything, and I hope you remember the times we spent just talking and being best friends because they were some of my best on this server. You were my make and break factor for a very long time, so thank you kid. You're amazing. I'll be seeing you around.

>> Brooke/Whoever You Are <<
I don't know who you are, or even if you're a guy, and now that I look at it... I really don't doubt it. But hey, we were all naive at some point, so I'm not thanking you as a person, I'm thanking the idea of who you were. Thanks for being what I needed at the time, and granted, you probably ended up being a dude... it doesn't really matter. You made my experience at SG enjoyable, and being a 13 year old boy would make me believe just about anything. Anyways, thanks for all of our talks, and I appreciate who you used to be. Good luck in your life, if you ever get the chance to read this message, and the wedding was great ahaha.

>> Felicia/Hanging On <<
You're something else. Probably the first girl on this server that I made friends with. I remember Brooke saying she'd kill you because we used to flirt all of the time, those were the good days. You are incredibly reasonable and considerate, and welcomed me back with open arms each time I came back. I'm so incredibly lucky to have a friend like you for the duration of my time at this server, and I hope you stick it out and stay with this server until the very end. They could really use someone as amazing as you. I applaud you for sticking it out this long, so see it through. Good luck friend.

>> Ancient Boom/Tyler <<
Well... what can I say about Mr. Tyler? Only person who ever knew my password on this server because you were one of the first people I ever trusted. I remember fighting with Travis for hours concerning your bans and unbans, and I remember telling him I'd quit immediately if you weren't given another chance... and another chance... and another chance.. and another chance... and another chance. Well, I guess patterns repeat themselves, but I needed you to stick around, it was essential. I wish I still saw you around here, but it seems like you've come and gone with the wind, so wherever it may take you... good luck with whatever you do. Any community would be lucky to have you in it. Good luck my friend, although I doubt you need it.

>> King Puffy/John <<
I don't remember whatever happened between us, but you used to be one of my best friends on this server too... so this message is for that John, not the one that sided with everyone else when I needed someone to help me through it all. Just don't lose yourself in this world, alright? You're a strong kid, and you're extremely intelligent with a sense of humor that is specific to you. Good luck John, I'm proud of you. You'll also always have a friend in me.

>> Micheal/Strpurdu <<
Well, we've had a long ass ride. You're a good friend, and sometimes back stabbed me when the time came down to it, but you were always someone I feared meeting up with in the PK Box, as you were a master of the hybrid playstyle. You'll do anything you want in this lifetime, so good luck with that and play your cards right. Good luck friend, with whatever you choose to do.

>> Aaron/Teh Beast <<
Well, what can I say bro. You did it. You're in charge of basically the entire community, and you're one of the most respected players in this entire community. I'm proud of you, I remember when you first joined. I got you in-game mod, and then departed from the server. I can tell you've grown up a lot since then, and I'm grateful for having a friend and prodigy like yourself... although, by now, you've even surpassed me. Good job bro, stay strong. Keep doing what you can for this community, and keep your staff on their toes, sometimes they need a little extra reminding.

>> Gta/Phil <<
Bro, I love you. I remember fighting so hard for you throughout these years, it was ridiculous. It didn't matter what I did, but I backed you up no matter what. I posted threads telling kids to stop picking on you.. damn, I remember when you were a sensitive little girl... those were the days too, stay with it bro, you're a legend here. You were one of my best friends... and I'm going to be forever grateful for the support and love you gave me throughout these last couple of years. You're my brother, and if you ever need anything, I will be there for you. Stay strong kid, love you.

>> Brenden/Lalas <<
I love you. I don't even have words to describe it. You're the last on my list, but definitely not the least. I spent years coming back and each time I'd check my visitor messages and there'd be a message from you. It'd usually be an angry message from not replying to you in time, or letting you know I was back, but granted... you were like my best friend. I'm so lucky to have had you while I was here... and bro, you're the coolest kid I know. Stay with it, and I love you bro. Good luck in anything you do.

>> Everyone Else <<
I guess this is it, I love you all. I hope you all choose to stay here at this server and help Travis, but that's always your choice, of course. If you can do something to help the server, then do it. If your Admins/Mods tell you to do something, then do it. Give Travis helpful suggestions and ideas, nothing stupid. You're all a huge factor of this, do you understand that? If you don't, then don't be stupid, just shut up and let the kids who are wanting to make this server a better place do their thing. Survive this drought, and the rain will be victorious. Good luck to all of you.

- If you want to keep in touch, add my Skype so we can talk and things like that, even if we don't really know each other, feel free to add me anyways, I'm always looking for new friends. My Skype is logehcol so I'll be looking forward to some new friends by tonight.

Goodbye, everyone.
  
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Default 11-11-2014, 04:41 PM

tl:dr: Usually read long threads but it's kinda pointless this time around.
I think you just wanted to have your say and leave. No harm done I guess, cya.


  
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Default 11-11-2014, 04:42 PM

Nice essay mang

but really

Good luck in life, you've left some really deep emotional feedback here and I hope the people who see it appreciate it.






Spoiler


  
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Default 11-11-2014, 04:58 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Skullcracka View Post
No offense, I'm sure you put a lot of thought into this post, but I can't even count on both my hands how many times a post like this has been made. Heck, I can't even count on both my hands how many times this post has been made from someone like yourself who came back from whenever.
Mhm.

Nice to see you for the few days.




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that I work hard every day, that I never dog it.
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Default 11-11-2014, 05:00 PM

See you later alligator.





In-game name: Pat
Promoted: 25/1/2013
Re-promoted: 5/3/2014
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Default 11-11-2014, 05:19 PM

You're all fucking talk. You talk a mean game when it comes to making everyone believe you're worthy and getting everyone to feel bad for you, but you don't show your emotions and sorrow any other time..

Quote:
I'd have broken my back to see this server succeed
That's where coming back, causing problems, leaving, coming back, causing problems, leaving comes into place, yeah?
That's why you came back this time, professed your love for me, and got turned down.
So what'd you do? You jumped on Travis and lashed out against him, then lashed out against me and left.
You blamed me for him being in the mindset he's in, when your dumbass put him there.

Typical fucking Matt.

Quote:
I'd have done anything to see him improve his mental and emotional state.


Yeah, you sure did everything you could to keep his mindset in a positive manner.


You don't understand Matt. You were top shit 5 years ago. That's it.
You were top shit because you manipulated people and forced people to listen to you else they'd get the wrath of Haiku.
That is why people bitched about you all the fucking time.
You think you're everything.

You think you're some SG God when you were just an administrator that Travis listened to.
You never had server files. You never had ACP. You had words and someone to listen to them.



Sometimes we just need a friend.
Someone to hold us when you can't stand.
Sometimes even to pretend like you matter for that split second that everything seems to be crashing down.
And sometimes it's just easier to say goodbye.

  
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Default 11-11-2014, 05:34 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Brittany View Post
You're all fucking talk. You talk a mean game when it comes to making everyone believe you're worthy and getting everyone to feel bad for you, but you don't show your emotions and sorrow any other time..

That's where coming back, causing problems, leaving, coming back, causing problems, leaving comes into place, yeah?
That's why you came back this time, professed your love for me, and got turned down.
So what'd you do? You jumped on Travis and lashed out against him, then lashed out against me and left.
You blamed me for him being in the mindset he's in, when your dumbass put him there.

Typical fucking Matt.



Yeah, you sure did everything you could to keep his mindset in a positive manner.

You don't understand Matt. You were top shit 5 years ago. That's it.
You were top shit because you manipulated people and forced people to listen to you else they'd get the wrath of Haiku.
That is why people bitched about you all the fucking time.
You think you're everything.

You think you're some SG God when you were just an administrator that Travis listened to.
You never had server files. You never had ACP. You had words and someone to listen to them.
I had an entire thing typed out, but I'm not going to do that to you. I don't care what you've got to say, nor do I care what you think of me. I've said what I need to say, and that's enough for me.
  
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Default 11-11-2014, 06:01 PM

Seeing some of those names on that list brings back some good memories.

;;didn't really expect you to stay long.

Most of the people that are active on here probably don't know you so it makes it really funny to see you try to act like the 'sg god' or whatever you think you were 5 years ago.

Cya
  
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Default 11-11-2014, 06:16 PM

Well, that de-escalated quickly.

Hope you got the attention you were looking for, ciao~


  
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Default 11-11-2014, 08:18 PM

Whether it was heartfelt or not, still one of the most interesting posts on here in a while.

If nothing else, thanks for keeping me entertained.

You seem intelligent enough and rather persuasive which are two qualities necessary for success.

I'm sure you'll do well in life so long as you stop checking in on decrepit Runescape private servers.

Peace.


MAKE SILAB GREAT AGAIN
  
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